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|The Dominator and Mr Right|
THE SEXUAL CONTROLLER
Won't accept no for an answer
Keeps you pregnant OR
Rejects your advances
KING OF THE CASTLE
Treats you as a servant/slave
Says women are for sex, cooking and housework
Expects sex on demand
Controls all the money
Stops you from working and seeing friends
Tells you what to wear
Keeps you in the house
Seduces your friends/family
Says you are a bad mother
Turns the children against you
Uses access to harass you
Threatens to take the children away
Persuades you to have his baby, and then refuses to help you care for it
Denies any abuse
Says it was 'only' a slap
Blames drink, drugs, stress, overwork, you, unemployments, etc.
Threatens to hurt or kill you or the children
Says he loves you
Threatens to kill himself
Threatens to report you to Social Services, DSS, etc
Puts you down
Tells you you're too fat, too thin, ugly, stupid, useless, etc.
Shows you physical affection without assuming it will lead to sex
Accepts your right to say no to sex
Shares responsibility for contraception etc.
Talks to you
Listens to you
Is a companion
Has a sense of humour
Does his share of the housework
Shares financial responsibility
Treats you as an equal.
Welcomes your friends and family
Encourages you to have outside interests
Encourages you to develop your skills at work or at college.
Is a responsible parent
Is an equal parent
Supports your dealings with the children.
Admits to being wrong.
Takes responsibility for his own well-being and happiness
Behaves like a reasonable human being.
Says you look good
Values your opinions.
Supports your ambitions
Says you are competent